It is estimated that the average person makes around 35,000 decisions a day. The vast majority of these are relatively simple such as What time do I get up? What shall I wear today? What shall I have for breakfast? These are usually easy to make and we rarely over-think them. We make many decisions subconsciously when we are on automatic pilot doing routine tasks. However, the range of decisions we have to make and the complexity of them vary considerably.
What about those more complex, difficult decisions? We so often think about decision making as a purely cognitive process. We make pros and cons lists. We try to project into the future. We try to rationalize the what if’s, the possibilities, the probabilities. How will this decision affect other people? We may look externally and take advice. It can be quite an exhausting process. It can take a lot of time and the whole decision-making process can stop us in our tracks and nothing moves forward.
Think back to the start of 2021 as we were trying to run and grow our businesses during an unprecedented pandemic. If there was ever a difficult time to make clear decisions, it was then.
Did you make plans or set some ambitious goals about how you wanted your business or career to progress? Did you think about maybe taking a course, doing more targeted social media, doing a podcast or updating your website?
Or did you make plans regarding your home life? Did you want to improve a relationship, get a pet, declutter your house or move home? Did any of those goals not happen?
All of these things require really complex decision making. So many of us just get stuck and then we resort to our default decision of not doing anything.
Think of a complex decision you are struggling with or stuck upon right now. It may be to do with your work or homelife?
Think about that particular thing.
What is coming up for you in your body?
Is this a familiar feeling? Can you feel a resistance?
Can you identify any emotions around it?
Is it overwhelm, fear, fear of failure, fear of success, fear of being judged, imposter syndrome, the lack of technical knowledge?
Our body is talking to us all the time. Our body holds wisdom. We speak about trusting our gut feeling, having a hunch, having a sixth sense, using our intuition. What if we can super-charge the decision-making process by incorporating what our body is trying to tell us?
Step 1 – Using the Cognitive Process
For these complex big decisions, we have to chunk them down into a series of much smaller steps and smaller decisions.
For example, if our goal was to create podcasts; Do I have the technical skills? Who do I go to, to help me? What subjects will I talk about? What if people don’t listen? What if people do listen? If I start something, will I have to continue with it? Do I have the time and energy for all of this?
Step 2 – Tuning into your body’s wisdom
Try each of the following three practical methods to find out which works best for you.
The Strength Test
Bring together your index finger and thumb on your least dominant hand to make a circle.
Then bring your index finger and thumb from the dominant hand over and under the circle and join them together inside the circle as if you are making links of a chain.
Hold the circle of the least dominant hand tight while you say yes, yes, yes to yourself. Say an absolute positive to yourself such as my name is……Pull against the circle with your dominant hand link. Feel the strength.
Now say an absolute no, no, no. Say a complete untruth such as I live on the moon. Pull on the circle again. Is It easier to break the chain? Have you lost strength?
Once you have ascertained how your hand strength changes with yes and no, ask your body a question. Feel the strength in the link. Are you getting a strong response or a weak response? Is your body saying yes, or no?
Generally speaking, decisions that are right for us make our body stronger and it’s much harder to break the link.
The Sway Test
Stand tall with your feet pointing forwards, hip width apart and shoulders relaxed. Place your right hand on your heart.
Say yes, yes, yes to yourself. State an absolute positive, an absolute truth. The vast majority of people sway forwards for a yes.
Now say no, no, no. State a blatant untruth. The vast majority of people sway backwards for a no.
Repeat this a number of times until you are sure what your body’s yes and no response is.
Generally speaking, decisions that are right for us make our body sway forward.
The Friction Test
Rub the pad of your index finger of your dominant hand over the pad of your thumb. Feel how it feels. Now say yes, yes, yes and state an absolute truth. How does it feel? Now say no, no, no and state a blatant untruth. How does your finger and thumb slide together now? Can you feel any difference?
Generally speaking, things that are right for us cause less friction between the thumb and the finger.
So, by tuning into the body in these ways, asking carefully crafted questions, we can often gain insights which can guide us into making the right decision.
An easy way to test which method works best for you is to hold a supplement or food against your heart and ask the question, “Is this good for me today?” This is almost impossible to answer cognitively, but your body will know the answer. Are you swaying forwards, have you lost strength, or is there a change in friction between your thumb and finger?
There are further steps you can take to help make a complex decision, especially if you are getting yes and yes answers to your carefully worded questions. If both are right, which option is best?
A skilled dowser can use a dowsing technique to determine changes in the size of your energy field when you focus on each option. Things that are right and true for us cause us to have an expansive energy field. Things that are not good for us cause our energy field to contract in towards the body. By taking measurements of the changes in energy field, first from a neutral position and then subsequently with focus on each option, a dowser can ascertain which option is energetically more favourable.
You can just make a decision and then get into energetic alignment with it using a process called the Balance Procedure. A skilled practitioner or trainer of the technique will be able to show you the method and help you balance each chakra in turn, followed by balancing the whole body whilst incorporating the Law of Attraction.
You can work on your fears and negative limiting beliefs about making the wrong decision using a process called EFT or Emotional Freedom Techniques. So much of what we project into the future has its origins in the past. To learn Emotional Freedom Techniques is probably one of the most valuable gifts you can give yourself. A skilled practitioner or trainer will help you get clarity and release old patterns which no longer serve you.
Making decisions that are right for us is so important for our overall health, happiness and wellbeing. Our body holds wisdom and can play a valuable part in helping us make those difficult decisions. Be kind and gentle with yourself throughout the process and trust you are doing the best you can in the situation you find yourself in.
Written by Carol Crowther of www.eft-reiki.co.uk
Carol is a Complementary Holistic Therapist and Trainer who uses a range of non-invasive techniques to help people of all ages live a happier, more fulfilled life.